Our "Colic" Fixes

For about a month, Hugo had these bouts of the hardest crying I have ever witnessed. It would last about two hours, every night around or after 6pm, and he was unconsolable. We tried everything I could think of.

“Colic” is an umbrella term that refers to hard crying lasting 3 hours or longer. It does not explain the source of the crying, the emotion involved, or the discomfort. Another term for it is “purple crying.” (Accurate, as their faces almost turn purple.) My niece, a preemie nurse sent me this article about purple crying, meant to help us feel better in that a) he won’t hurt himself and b) we were not doing anything wrong. It was helpful, but I still felt uncomfortable accepting that given how common babies are (uhhh we’ve all been one, so many of us have or will have them), we understand so little about these frantic expressions of discontentment.

I read about 100 articles. I searched and searched every chance I got for any new information. How can we have so many solutions to so many things in life, and not this agony? Watching your sweet baby scream until his eyes are red is a certain form of hell.

Now, the biggest thing I’ve learned while being a mother in this short time is that no one thing that works for one mother works for every mother. So although the community and the forums share their tips, it doesn’t mean they will work for your baby. Every baby is so vastly different, and the grey area of baby care is the most vast area of real life I’ve ever witnessed. Truly. It is the least black and white area of all. THERE ARE NO TRUE ANSWERS that you don’t have to try out, flop around with, fail with some and hopefully win at a few, too.

That said, I’m going to share what attempts we made to soothe his crying spells. On some nights, some of these things worked. Some of the nights, none of these things worked. I cycled through all of my “solutions” until something clicked. After visiting the naturopath and sticking Hugo on a homeopathic, the pattern more or less stopped. Coincidence? Who knows. But at 12.5 weeks, Hugo no longer has this habitual crying attack in the evenings.

1) I made a playlist of cello or piano music, brought us to a dim-lit room and tried to soothe him with side-lying feeding. It makes sense that the colic was spurred, on some days, from a complete overwhelm or overstimulation. Every day things are brand new for a developing baby, and the parents are the only reassuring constant. Imagine living in a world where your stability shifts every single day? Your vision changes and sharpens, shapes appear… How terrifying. Having a ritual of soothing music, the mother’s scent and warmth, and fresh food proved a helpful interruption to his upset.

2) Guillermo would lightly bounce on a stability ball in the evenings. We still do this sometimes. With my prolapse, I sit this out. It also allows us to share the duties - essential because the crying is so exasperating, and both parents will need a break to recollect their cool.

3) Speaking of keeping your cool, this is a point of its own. On days where I felt more stress, discomfort in my body, anxiety of any kind, Hugo’s crying was noticeably more intense. Pass him to the more calm parent, and work on easing your own psychological discord to bring down the baby’s intensity. Trust me, you’ll benefit too, so do the work for yourself.

4) Obviously, gut pain is a real thing for babies. We did a lot of playing around with what he was consuming to make sure it was optimal and he wasn’t too agonized by gas. My milk production is mediocre, so figuring out feeding took quite a while. The balance we eventually struck was: I take domperidone and eat lactation cookies to boost production/speed, and pump a few bottles per day. I also breastfeed exclusively overnight, so that he’s not chugging bottles and then going right back to sleep (all overnight feeds are dreamfeeds, he doesn’t full wake up). I avoid gluten and dairy - and spicy tomato anything. We learned that the hard way! It was proven time and time again. We’ve supplemented with donor milk for the days when he rejected breasfeeding during the day, preferring bottles - and I couldn’t keep up with him. Since our donor has a bit of dairy, we also kept Holle Goat Milk formula on hand. His allergies and intolerances are still a bit of a mystery, but I’m almost positive now that dairy is a major issue and gluten isn’t awesome, either. I’ve always more or less avoided dairy and gluten, but had some flexibility. Now, I’ve had to become more strict for his sake.

5) My naturopath, Rachel Schwartzman, is a mother of 3, a doula and an absolute natural healthcare wizard. She is supremely experienced and educated. We followed her advice of castor oil belly rubs daily and giving him a homeopathic. The day after we started the homeopathic (crushed up and soaked in milk), the consistent screaming attacks stopped. Seriously. I also drink fennel tea, even though I hate the taste. Anything for Hugo!

6) We take a bath with him! This has been my favourite. A friend recommended this ages ago, and I wasn’t keen to try. It was only when I desperately and unthinkingly turned on the tub tap during a crying episode, noted his IMMEDIATE calm, that we decided to try it. Guillermo did it first. Hugo not only calmed, but delighted in the experience. I now do it every few baths :) and he’s the cutest little guy learning to splash around in there now.

Once you have a screaming baby, you know you will try anything to bring them back to peace & happiness. Just in case any of my ideas may help you, I felt it best to share. If you have any ideas for others, please leave them in the comments section! And best of luck to my fellow parents. This shit is so beautiful, and it’s also no walk in the park!