Oof, this is such an emotional one.

I’ve written a thousand things in my head about this but haven’t put fingers to keys in so long. Our family has decided (truly- kids voices included) to head back to Toronto, Canada and settle back in among our friends and family.

Reflecting on change at terranea, palos verdes

My head and heart are booming loudly these days as we steer through the last couple of weeks in the South Bay of LA. When we moved here, we landed in what turned out to be the most beautiful landscape for this chapter. While up until recently, we imagined we would be in California forever, I’ve been able to reframe this as a chapter that’s just bursting with life-shaping memories and some of the most amazing people I’ve ever met.

Today we are on our way to Terranea Resort just 20 minutes south along the coast, to spend the weekend in a hotel by the ocean and really soak it all in. I’m not going to avoid or deny my feelings. A growing maturity has brought me the most important gift: the ability to accept feeling opposing feelings at the same time. Grief, joy, presence, doubt, and also confidence that it will all work out. The feeling that we can’t go wrong by doing right by our family. The understanding that I’ll ache for California in the coming years, while appreciating that familiarity and comfort of home.

Playing with the boys at terranea resort

The bigger pieces of our decision came from wanting our kids to experience more family, and our family to experience more of our kids. To have more togetherness and community. Sure, I’m saying goodbye to the flooding of year-long plants, hummingbirds and butterflies we’ve lived among here. The backyard gym that came together beautifully and served as a backdrop to the building of remarkable relationships, constructive conversations and overall, major life shifts.

There are smaller contributions to this decision, too. Small things that barnacle together and lead to bigger things. I had hoped for an election result that would create a better direction for the climate, among other things. For me personally, especially after the fires, this feeling compiled with the others and put us into action.

I love California. We may one day be back. We received news of Permanent Residency approval just weeks after making our decision to move. So, we’ll see what the future holds. Embracing flexibility and adaptability has allowed us so far to experience so much adventure and joy. Which is really what this three years has captured overall.

While I intend to check in and share more through the transition, I am also intent on reducing overwhelm. So perhaps my next post will be from Toronto, from my new studio space in Lawrence Park.

Not only are we moving May 1st, but I am also trying to get my app ready by this date, and will be writing my final exam for Full Body Systems (Functional Nutrition Alliance) in the month of May, as well.

The app will feature tons of on-demand workouts, recipes, whole health guidance and more. And once my exam is complete, I’ll begin offering functional nutrition counselling appointments. This work will help to fill the gaps between health care and the patient, and provide nutritional and functional solutions for your complete health picture.

This is what I’ve always wanted.

So off we go on a 3 day vacation. And LA, I’m going to miss you so damn much.

Toronto, my deep core home, we’ll see you soon.